Thursday, August 28, 2008


I am an east coaster now. As such, I have plenty of bias. You can read all about it at my fancy new blogspot blog. It has a fancy latin name, which means instant credibility (why do all those judges use a dead language? To mask the weakness of their arguments of course). So visit the new blog, leave a comment, tell your friends, and send me lots of money to help me pay off my $130,000 law school debt.

Thanks for reading.

Tuesday, August 05, 2008

One Week Later

I was heading into the City on Sunday night to go see a small show (i.e. not Lollapa-whatever), with a friend. We were taking I-88, and I was explaining to my friend how much all the construction on I-88 sucks because if I am good at anything, it is in pointing out the obvious. He replied to this by asking when the last time I was on I-88 was.

I drew a blank. Literally. I told him that I knew I had been on I-88 in the last week, but for about two minutes I could not remember what business I had attended to in the City.

It likely would have been longer had he not said, "Oh, the Bar Exam right?"

So my efforts at blocking out the entire bar exam experience have been quite successful.


I tried reading after the bar exam. It may have been my choice of book, but nothing was sticking. I would read for ten minutes, then flip back a couple of pages, and it was like I was looking at the words for the first time. Horribly frustrating. To compensate, I picked up a young adult book and was able to read the entire thing, albiet in twice the amount of time it should have taken me.

I am not sure when I will be able to start reading again. Hopefully soon. I still have about two months to kill.


Why waive Scott Eyre when you could have waived Bobby Howry?


In ten days I will unofficially become a resident of Virginia. Weird.


Law School is over. The bar exam is over (hopefully). Looks like that is about it for this blog . . .

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Last Bar Exam Thought Ever (Knock on Wood)

Done. Not much else to say. Pretty sure I passed, but it will take another few months to know for sure, and by then I will be working and in DC. So it would really suck to fail.

Pray for me.

Oddly enough, I got a summons for jury duty today. Weird.

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Bar Exam Thought of the Day

Finished day one. Lots to talk about, but I am as brain dead as you are. Therefore, I called in some favors, and Dr. Horrible's Sing-A-Long Blog is available for free for another day.

Screw the cram session, relax, and watch an awesome musical.

Monday, July 28, 2008

Bar Exam Thoughts of the Day

I have no interesting thoughts today. They are all law related.

But the next person that says "Good Luck" to me is going to get punched. I did not just spend the last two months [sometimes] busting my ass so that Luck would factor into it.

But it does.

[I just had a thought. With this whole pen and pencil thing, I am afraid the Bar Exam is going to end up like that test Will Smith took in Men in Black.


Sunday, July 27, 2008

Bar Exam Thought of the Day

It's only the rest of my life.

I always knew I was destined for Broadway. Failing may just be the push I need.

of course, I cannot sing, dance, act, direct, work lighting rigs, see color, act all gay, wear tight pants, jump, build things, do makeup or hair, have a creative thought, write, think outside the box, or juggle. Shit, lawyer is about the only job for which I am qualified.

Saturday, July 26, 2008

Bar Exam Thought of the Day

Re Handwriting: If my "u" looks like a "v" and my "c" looks like a "u" and my "r" looks like a "v" or "u" and my "e" looks like an archaic Alchemist symbol for sulfur, then whenever I write the word "occurrence" will the Bar Exam Grader constructively know that my answer stinks?

Friday, July 25, 2008

83 Hours . . .

Alright, now I am starting to get stressed out. Usually I only get a little stressed out the night before the exam. But here it is, three evenings ahead, and I am not sure I can take it anymore.

All the professional attorneys that I have talked about the bar exam have all made a similar comment. Something like, "By the time you get around to taking it, you are so stressed out, that you do not even care if you pass it. You just want it done and over with."

I am starting to come around to that line of thinking. I really do not much care anymore. Sure there is still a lot of work to do (written, unconditional, promise to pay, order or bearer, a sum certain, of money, with no extraneous undertaking--Is that all the elements of negotiability? feel like I am missing one, and hence the problem (note: have not looked at commercial paper in at least five days)).

I think the persecuted crack smoker said it best, "I want my life back."

I have been doing a bunch of advanced questions on StudySmart in lots of 17. Current relevant percentages: Property: 73%.* Evidence: 40%. I get property. I like property. I like property because you read the question, figure out the answer, then look at the options and pick the one that conforms to the answer you already decided. Evidence (and Torts and K), you have to read the damn entire answer 90% of the time. Aww fuck it. "D" for esquire right?

In addition to the regular stress of the Test, others things weighing on my mind:

  • I had to go to the Wal-Mart today to get a new battery put in a watch. This is annoying for several reasons. First, I have not worn a watch in years. I do not even know the last time I wore one. So for the last couple of days I was wearing a watch that did not work, just so I could used to it. Annoyance. Second, I had planned on using a pocket watch for the exam, but because the bar examiners do not allow watches on the table (the constant looking down at a watch situated on my leg would look suspicious), I have to practice wearing a watch. Third, I swear I am not driving more until I have to, wait this should be next
  • I am not driving any more unless absolutely necessary. In the last couple of days I have either gotten stuck behind some slow ass dick, railroaded, or almost sideswiped by some ass who ran a stop sign. Fuck that. I am living off iced tea and butter for the next three days.
  • Conan was on vacation this week. How am I supposed to sleep if I cannot drift away to the smooth stylings of Conan jokes that I have not heard before? Fuck him.
  • I check to make sure that my pink voucher is sitting on the table where I left at least 20 times an hour.
  • I think I am up to about 2 1/2 packs a day. This is getting ridiculous. I am quitting within a month of the bar. For serious.
  • I waste too much time with stupid blog posts.
Alright, enough bitching.

And I just realized that it is Friday. So no daily show. I guess I should just study for another hour.

*seriously, how was I supposed to know that right of refusal is not subject to RAP when it was given to the first leasehold, even though the leaseholder subsequently assigned the K such that the right of refusal touched and concerned the land? Yeah, what I just wrote does not even make sense to me and I probably fucked up the law on that somehow, but just goes to show how fucked up that question was.

Bar Exam Thought of the Day

Uhhh . . .

But the real hilarious part is that she has a website devoted to helping people pass the bar.

Thursday, July 24, 2008

Bar Exam Thought of the Day

Two unoriginal thoughts today (that is why there is two), blatantly stolen from the works of Joss Whedon.

Captain Hammer sings:

Don’t worry if it’s hard,
if you’re not a friggin' ‘tard you will prevail

Whistler says:

There are moments in your life that make you, that set the course of who you're gonna be. Sometimes they're little, subtle moments. Sometimes they're not. I'll show you what I mean . . .

. . .

Bottom line is, even if you see 'em coming, you're not ready for the big moments. No one asks for their life to change, not really. But it does. So what are we, helpless? Puppets? No. The big moments are gonna come. You can't help that. It's what you do afterwards that counts. That's when you find out who you are. You'll see what I mean.

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Bar Exam Thought of the Day

If this study makes you more confident about the Bar Exam, I have some bad news for you.

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Just Call Me Doctor Claw

I have spent the last few days doing a lot of writing. I had originally intended to do a full day of Exam Writing just like the real Bar exam (with the exception of three essays instead of an MPT, with 12 essay topics, it would have worked out well), but I decided that that idea was stupid. Not wholly stupid, but the reasons behind the decision were stupid. I was not doing it to test my knowledge, but rather to exercise my hand for the grueling six hours of writing.

I figured out a couple days ago that there was a better way to do my training; one that is conducive to learning (i.e. memorization). I decided to just re-write my notes. The lecture notes that is. But to make it feel like I was doing more than just re-writing my lecture notes, I pulled out the mini-review (literally) and the big outline, to cross check anything I was unsure about and find the random factoids (err, lawoids), that Kaufman neglected to mention because he was too concerned with spending 20 minutes on getting the correct exam answer for some question rather than an exhaustive survey of the law.*

This was a ridiculously long process. I started, I think on Friday (might have been Saturday, my short term memory is shot (because I have to remember all these rules and exceptions and exceptions to the exceptions)), and wrote for as long as I could. I think it was about eight hours. Then, the next day, I continued the process, but could barely write for five hours. Yeah, that was Saturday, because Sunday I took most of the day off to go buy a new computer (more on this at some point, I have a lot of bitching to do about my old computer). Sunday was not a total waste, because I outlined Family Law (such Fun! Wish I could do that again), even though my arm was still in pain and I could barely grip my Dr. Grip. (I had originally intended to use cheap pens, and by cheap I mean the box of 36 Papermates I bought at Office Max for $2.50 because I fully expect that is what will be given us for the bar exam, but that lasted about two hours. Fuck those pens, it is not just the fact that they are skinny, but also the shitty rollerball they have. A crappy pen requires more force against the paper, while my sweet Dr. Grip, despite its name, glides elegantly across the page, depositing the ideal amount of ink to form a letter with minimal effort. (not as great as a ceramic pen, but good enough that it does not bug me incessantly.))

So, to shorten this up, because yous probably have shit to do, the plan worked. I wrote for six hours today. There was not a lot of pain, just mostly a lingering a soreness, such that I am confident that I will have the ability to write for six hours without the pain bugging me.

Granted there is one problem. I decided to celebrate the finishing of the outline writing by drinking a Bud Light. However, my arm/hand is so exhausted that I could not twist off the top. I do not know if that is more pathetic or sad. At least my bottle opener still works. If I still cannot twist off a top by Sunday, I will be worried about arm fatigue.

But now I suppose I should start worrying about actually knowing the stuff that is going to be tested.

*Not a bad thing, just not how I would have taught it. I get a little leery about this approach because at least three times during BarBri, the instructor would say something like, "Then in February '07, they caught us off guard by including this fact which requires this analysis." BarBri is rightly reactionary, and they rightly focus the lectures on the most heavily tested areas (and previously tested areas), but I get all paranoid by these statements. It has gotten to the point that I am positive that there is going to be one question on the essay where I am just like, What the Fuck is that? Thankfully, I have come to grips with this, i.e. the fact there is going to be something on the exam where I have absolutely no clue what they want me to talk about. My plan is to take a deep breath, put on my bull shitting pants and start each line with these letters, no matter what:


Bar Exam Thought of the Day

I wonder if I should fast on Monday, because I am going to be spending all day Tuesday pulling knowledge out of my ass and I do not want any shit to get in the way.

Monday, July 21, 2008


Brand New is coming to Chicago just a couple days after the Bar Exam. Of course, by the time I found about it, the show was already sold out. Dang. I really probably could have used something like this after the exam:

Nevermind. I am too damn old for that now. I think I might just sit in an empty bar sipping a scotch, while Perry Como plays on the jukebox.

Thursday, July 17, 2008

A Nice Break

For that those that are unaware, I am a Joss Whedon fanboy. I have all the Buffy, Angel, and Firefly DVDs and am eagerly anticipating his new show.

But anyway, he has a new internet production out. It has Doogie, Mal Reynolds, one of the potential slayers and lots and lots of songs. Plus, hilarity.

So if the final week and half of bar study is getting you down, or you just have 45 minutes to kill, check it out. Oh, and it will only be available until the 20th (FYI Act III goes up on Saturday), so watch it.