It is Things Like This That Explain My Male-Pattern Baldness

You know I love hockey. If you scroll down, you will see about 20 youtube hockey videos in one post. And I watched about 100 to narrow it down to those 20.

So you can undoubtedly understand that I had hockey on while doing my reading last night, until I realized I was doing too much watching and not enough reading (even though the TV was on mute), and forced myself to turn off the TV. Hey, you should forgive, I was tired and had a lot of work to do. The Pens were getting crushed anyway. Much later, I flipped the TV back on and saw that Vancouver was up on Dallas 4 to 2. I think it was the third period, and the Canucks have Luongo, so I figured the game was over, finished up my reading and watched an episode of Firefly on DVD. By now it is about 1:30 a.m. Extremely tired and ready for bed, I start surfing the channels looking for something decent, since Adult Swim is showing crappy anime now.

Lo' and behold, I come across the ESPN ticker, and what the fuck? The Canucks and Stars are still playing! It is the Second Overtime! This is great. One great part of playoff hockey is the fact that the game will not end until someone wins. So get under my covers, put the sleep timer on 60 minutes, and wait for someone to win.

Only no one does. The second OT ends with the score tied 4-4. 20 minutes later, the 3rd OT begins. 3 overtimes, now I am invested, I am not sleeping until this thing is done. Sure I punked out on the beggining and middle and the first end of the game, but I am here now and that is what matters right?

Besides, the Third OT was fucking awesome. A couple of "pings" (when the shot hits a post), no penalties and of course, no goals. But also no commercials. The 3rd OT ends at 2:50 a.m. with the score still tied. With 20 minutes until 4th OT starts, I flip to the Cartoon Network and catch the last bit of Futureama and the first bit of Family Guy. 3:10 rolls around, and I go back to Versus (the network that broadcasts hockey).

[pause for dramatic effect]

They are showing a pilates infomercial. My mind starts racing, what the fuck is this? Is this a commercial or an infomercial (but in my heart I know). I wait a couple minutes. I know the 4th OT has started. I know that I am on the right channel.

I know that I am fucking pissed.

I have to get out of bed, and turn on my computer (which takes five minutes to turn on). Stewing, and stewing some more, I sit there. It is quarter after three in the morning and I have to be up in five and half hours (that is, if i do not mind going to class in my skivvies and not peeing or brushing my teeth before I leave). My computer boots up, finally, but no, it cannot be that easy, because my sound card isnt recognized. I have to uninstall it and reinstall it so that I can hear sound.

While I wait an eternity for my computer to accomplish this relatively simple task, I check out the hockey message board, hfboards.com, check out the game thread, and discover that other people are facing the same dilemma. Fuck Versus I think.

So anyway, I get the sound working, go to NHL.com and get the radio feed and listen to the last five minutes of the game, which ends around 3:30 am on one of the Sedin Brothers Goals. Vancouver Wins. The GM Place is going nuts.

Sure would have been nice to see that.

So during that five minutes while I was listening to the game, I fire off an extremely angry letter to Versus, letting them know of my absolute displeasure.

I figured this would be the talk of the blogdome today, after all, everyone had the BigLead's back when Cowherd crashed their site and they have been all over Dice-K and Imus. I thought this was up there with MLB trying to put Extra Innings on DirecTV only.

But sadly, no one seems to care. I found two blog entries talking about this. This one (written as it happened and similar to what I would have written at the time, though I would have had about 200 more "fuck"'s) and this one, which makes the astute "Heidi" reference (also, mad props to that guy, Greg Brownell, because he is the one that got a hold of the AP, and made this a newsstory (it is likely Versus would have ignored it had they not been contacted by the AP)).

So all my favorite blogs never mentioned it once today, be it Shanoff, Deadspin, WithLeather, AwfulAnnouncing, NHL Fanhouse, OffWingOpinion, and all the rest.

A fucking travesty. However, based on the AP article, as well as the messages on Hfboards indicating that several people still had the game on Versus, Me thinks that blame rests with one party.

FUCK YOU TIME WARNER!!!!

Yeah, I said it. It seems that my cable company is the party most likely to blame for cutting off the game. It would be great to be able to switch, but you know, the whole monopoly thing and trees cutting off access to a satellite. I was forced to use Time Warner in Undergrad as well, and let me say, they really do suck (it took three fucking tries before they could figure out to hook my house up with cable, even though the people that lived here previously had it).

And they are going to wonder why we haven't paid out bill in three months.

So, in sum, I am very pissed to have missed the end of the sixth longest game in NHL history (though I did get to listen to it on streamed internet radio!). I am very pissed that no one in this country cares enough about hockey to mention this (though the AP story was on ESPN's NHL page). I am extremely pissed that the NHL did not contract around this with Versus, which in turn would have contracted with the cable companies to prevent pre-empting live programing such as this. (And if Versus was that smart, I will happily testify as to my pain and suffering in a court of law, showing that by Time Warners actions, Versus has lost their expectancy interest in me watching any future non-NHL programming on the network).

To conclude, read this. It has nothing to do with this bullshit, but it might pique your interest in the hockey playoffs, then when TV fucks you, you will understand my pain.